Tag Archives: conceptual art

Levitated Ass

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“Levitated Mass”, LACMA’s $6M orphan boulder by Michael Heizer. Perched over a pedestrian underpass, this sad quarry-speck is isolated by a bleak gravel pan where grass and trees once stood. People circle it, pause, then run away from it. Described as a megalith, it is not, as a megalith is associated with Stonehenge, Easter Island, and so on. This is merely a displaced 21.5′ boulder from a Riverside Co quarry. 
LA Co Museum Of Art, Los Angeles, CA. April 2013.

But that’s the pretty view. Feast your eyes on the harsh one:
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“The Art Doctor” Cannot Reanimate the Brain-Dead

Mr Shark has his own thoughts on the subject of art.

Mr Shark has his own thoughts on the subject of art.

I’m delighted to assure you that bullshit knows no boundaries or statute of limitations. The New Yorker had a lengthy article on “the Art Doctor”,  conservator Christian Scheidemann. I respect Mr Scheidemnan’s encyclopedic expertise. What I find thoroughly laughable is his considerable talents are keeping art swindles by the likes of Damien Hirst et al, on life support.

Exceptions to the sorrow were some droll moments where beetles were gnawing the guts of a Wilfredo Lam canvas because they liked the glue. Wilfredo could kick the asses of all the current Po-Mo darlings, and then entertain their mistresses in style.

So, I decided to fire off a letter, to hurl a dead cow over the parapets if you will:

Editors:

Did it occur to anybody else while reading “The Art Doctor” that the real task was conservation of a preposterous fraud? Every “artist” reverentially mentioned is a slick bullshit artist, a mountebank, a swindler and cheat; pimply adolescent trolls stumbling in the footsteps of giants. I can’t wait for all of their “works” to implode due to their moronic ineptitude.

There was no thud, but it felt good anyway.